I was one of those appalling children born with the demeanour and sensibilities of a 50-year-old.

Only work saved me from a lifetime of ‘fogeydom’; at 16 I turned up for my first day at work at the hi-fi company Linn Products, in my three-piece suit, eager to learn more about the intimate secrets of loudspeakers. I was given a tub of bitumen and a brush.